Can't you see I'm sick of fighting?

Whenever I was feeling wrong
I used to go and write a song
All my dreaming torn in pieces now

There wasn't much I used to need
A smile with glow, a summer breeze through
My heart
Now my mistakes are haunting me

Like winter came and put a freeze on
My heart
I've lost the power to understand
What it takes to be a man with 

My heart
I saw you wanted this to end
You tried your best to be a friend to
My heart

But I'm leaving
This worry town
Please, no grieving
My love,

Understand
Whenever I was feeling wrong
I used to go and write a song from
My heart 

But now I feel I've lost my spark
No more glowing in the dark for
My heart
So I'm leaving
This worry town
Please, no grieving
My love,
Understand
Understand
Understand
Understand
Understand

Understand
(Can't you see I'm sick of fighting?)
Understand
(Can't you tell I've lost my way?)

Understand
(Look at me, there's no denying)
Understand
(I won't last another day)

So I'm leaving
This worry town
Please, no grieving
My love, understand
That I'm leaving
This worry town
Please, no grieving
My love,
Understand
All my dreaming torn in pieces
All my dreaming torn in pieces
All my dreaming torn in pieces
All my dreaming torn in pieces now

All the words are gonna bleed from me

And I'm talkin' to myself at night
Because I can't forget

Ripiegato sul passato, attraversato da una crepa che non lascia entrare alcuna luce, ciò che fa male non è l'essere ormai incapace di vivere la mia vita, bensì l'incapacità di rappresentarla. Attingere a quell'Io che giace ferito nello scorrere dei ricordi è così doloroso che desisto, sconfitto, e tutto ciò che vorrei raccontare rimane una malinconia sognata ad occhi aperti. Il cantastorie ha perso le sue parole ed esse stanno sanguinando via da me...

Recoiling in the past, cracked by a fissure which doesn't allow any light through, the pain is not the incapacity of living my life but the incapacity of performing it. Drawing from that my inner self which lays wounded into the flowing stream of memories is so painful that I always desist, defeated, and all that I would like to tell remains just the malady of reverie. The storyteller has lost his words and all them are bleeding away from me...

Misoginia 14

Fra due mali, scelgo sempre quello che non ho mai provato prima. Così scriveva Oscar Wilde. Io, invece, preferirei riprendermi una delle mie donne del passato. 

#bloodyinterviews 6

In a job spec was written: 

Sent CV to ##emailaddress##

Specifying why this job, and where do you see your selves in 5 years

Mistakes are their own. 

So I wrote them:

22 February 2018

Dear Sir/Madam.

Let me open this cover letter answering your two questions.

Why do I want this job? For the money, of course. Gardening is a passion for me but working for a low wage makes even a passion unbearable. Variety of jobs doesn't pay the bills. This should answer also to which wage I will accept.

Where do I see myself in 5 years? In a better position. Which doesn't necessarily mean more money but a balanced situation, where all aspects of the job work to make it pleasant and allow some kind of growth. We spend too much time at work to do something unpleasant. If such a situation will be possible in your company I will be with you, otherwise, I will move on.

I apologise for my bluntness.

Now, let me talk briefly about my 25-year long working experience in the Horticultural Industry.

I don't know if they'll answer, but if they do we'll begin well.

#bloodyinterviews 5

During a chat on Skype with a Scottish employer.

Scotsman: Reading your CV I have the impression you get easily bored.

Me: That's not correct. I don't get easily bored, I get easily annoyed. I really despise people who can't keep to their word. So, if we make a deal, I expect you sticking to your own part of the deal. If you don't, I just move on. Simple.

March of the Machines

I will grow
Know my name

I will grow
Know my name
I am hope
I am the 'Frame

I advance
Up from the deep
A new chance
The march of the machines

I will grow
Know my name
I am hope
I am the 'Frame

I advance
Up from the deep
A new chance
The march of the machines

I will grow
Know my name
I am hope
I am the 'Frame

I advance
Up from the deep
A new chance
The march of the machines

I will grow
Know my name
I am hope
I am the 'Frame

I advance
Up from the deep
A new chance
The march of the machines

I will grow
Know my name
I am hope
I am the 'Frame

I advance
Up from the deep
A new chance
The march of the machines

The age of shadows will begin

Desperate obesession

La disperazione si fa densa nell'aria, l'idea che si possa avere un futuro si fa sempre più diafana nelle persone ed ogni stimolo alla lotta scompare. In tutto questo qualcuno deve comunque prendersi la colpa, quindi perché non addossarla a chi sia in grado di reggerne il peso e permettere a tutti gli altri di continuare a non prendere posizione? E le ossessioni non sono affatto un problema e sono anzi le benvenute, non fosse che una delle mie ossessioni, la più forte e lancinante, mi impedisce di mettere le altre a frutto. Il desiderio di qualcosa di nuovo che crei degli stimoli si mescola alla paura dell'ennesimo cambiamento, e quell'universo che credevo guidato da un proposito si rivela dominato dal caso. Non ci sono stelle in grado di tracciare un cammino per tutti coloro che si fermano a guardarle, c'è solo il caos di un mare i cui moti non hanno né ordine né direzione fissa, in cui chi è capace o fortunato ne cavalca le onde gigantesche e tutti gli altri finiscono per esserne schiacciati e travolti.

Desperation becomes thick in the air, the belief that having a future is possible becomes thin in the people's mind and any will to fight back fades away. In all that, someone has to get the fault, so why don't put it on the one who can carry its weight and let all the others avoiding to make a stand? And the obsessions are not a problem at all, they are even welcome, but for one of them, the strongest and most piercing, that prevents me from putting all the others to good use. The desire for something new capable of stirring me blends with the fear of one more change, while the universe believed driven by a purpose shows itself dominated by the chance. There are no stars in it that draw the path for everyone who stops to observe them, there's only the chaos of a sea which motions have no order nor fixed direction, where who is capable or lucky rides the gigantic waves and who is not get crushed.

I'm the one who sacrificed his son

I'm a whisper lost upon wind
I'm the ember that'll burn you down
I'm the water that'll drown you
I'm a star that's just a black hole now
I'm a terrifying danger
I'm a fruit decaying on the ground
I'm a swallower of anger
I'm the tree that falls and makes no sound
I make no sound…

'Cause if I stand up, I'll break my bones
And everybody loves to see a fall unfold
Ain't nobody giving up, 'cause nobody gives a fuck
Stand up and break my bones
Everybody wants what they just can't hold
There's nobody praying for me

I am fungus in the forest
I'm a lizard with a poison tongue
I'm the child in the manger
I'm the one who sacrificed his son
Rust is showing on my armour
I am wheezing like an old man done
I'm a product of my anger
I'm the bullet in a loaded gun

Stand up, I'll break my bones
And everybody loves to see a fall unfold
Ain't nobody giving up, 'cause nobody gives a fuck
Stand up and break my bones
Everybody wants what they just can't hold
There's nobody praying for me

'Cause if I stand up, I'll break my bones
And everybody loves to see a fall unfold
Ain't nobody giving up, 'cause nobody gives a fuck
Stand up and break my bones
Everybody wants what they just can't hold
There's nobody praying for me
(There's nobody praying for me)
There's nobody praying for me